Rate me, wake up!

17992252_10154639764717689_901194566185714953_nHappy Marriage – Fawn Weaver (creator of Happy Wives Club)

After listening to this Focus on the Family broadcast, I wanted to try it out.

Rating how you are doing in the marriage department as a couple can be so helpful in building better communication.  It can be a bit scary not knowing what your spouse will say, but if you go in with the attitude of wanting to improve then you will be fine. 🙂

I first shared with Michael what I learned in the podcast episode and said I wanted him to rate me and I would rate him on a 1 – 10 scale, 10 being AMAZING – don’t change a thing.  Mind you this was only two months into our marriage when I asked him.  I wasn’t expecting a 10, but I also wasn’t expecting a 4.  Definitely, a gut punch, he followed with some examples, one that I distinctly remember was comparing myself to others.  He didn’t like that I did it and didn’t see this being healthy for our marriage growth together. I totally agreed with him on that!  He was very kind when sharing with me since I am pretty sensitive.  However, on this day I assessed what I was doing to my relationship.  I knew I had to change how I was responding and acting towards Michael.  We both needed to change in some areas to make our marriage better.

Just because I was 27 compared to maybe getting married younger did not give me any magical knowledge of how marriage life would be. I was feeling insecure and lost in the marriage department.  The countless new things I was learning and trying to process living with a man for the first time and just seeing how different we really were outside of dating.  Growing up in my Christian faith and not sleeping with a man before marriage and now it was okay, it was a lot to take in.  I look back at that day and I know I am not a 4 anymore not quite a 10 either, but I have grown so much.  I have grown with my marriage and just have enjoyed learning what works and what doesn’t.

I thought by reading marriage books it would prepare me, but personally, after doing that I don’t feel there is a book out there that can tell you how to handle your marriage since each relationship is different.  I do enjoy reading and listening to books or podcasts to learn and form my own opinion on them on what would work for us.  I am willing to try anything out and if doesn’t work then oh well on to the next on figuring this out.  The Bible is always a good resource!

We are now in month 8 of marriage expecting our first little in Fall and I could not be happier.  As it turns out our church is doing a marriage series and at the end of Sunday service, he asked spouses to ask to be rated on how they are doing in their marriage.  I found this perfect with my topic!

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Podcast can be found on iTunes.

xo,

G

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